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Eph 5:22-33 (ESV)
22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.
25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.
Today’s passage is interesting and heavily debated! When you get into it, you’ll quickly understand why, and we could go into all the details, especially concerning the meaning of the word translated into English as “head” (the same thing is true regarding a passage in 1 Corinthians).
It’s easy to get lost in the weeds on this one, but don’t do it! At its core, this passage emphasizes mutual submission for husbands and wives, and this isn’t the only one.
Also, as an aside, we must remember that the Bible was not written in English. In verse 22, the English word “submit” is not even used in the Greek text. My point is that we must be careful how we read and understand Scripture so that we don’t read into the text something that isn’t there.
The term “head” in verse 23 can have multiple meanings. The meaning that I believe the context points us towards is “responsibility for.” The husband has a leadership role, but not as an overlord, or a boss, or as an inherent right; rather, the leadership role is one in which the husband takes on responsibility as he cares for and serves his wife. Remember, Jesus redefined greatness as being a servant (Matt 20.26-27).
In this context, the husband is prioritized, but contrary to ancient society, this is for the wife's benefit. This aligns with what we’ve been looking at throughout the letter, including Paul’s emphasis on building one another up in Christ.
In addition, the activity of both husband and wife is based on their relationship with Christ. So again, the emphasis is on mutual submission.
Reflecting on the passage, I find myself challenged in my marriage and relationship with others. What if we truly loved each other unconditionally (not being a doormat or anything like that, but loving others truly)? What would that look like, and how would it change the relationships, community, and world around us? What kind of witness do you think that would be to those who don’t know Jesus?
God bless you as you wrestle with this today. Know that I am praying for you.
Scott
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